Wedding Whoopsies

Jun. 28th, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

Brides, have you ever had a lofty cake dream...

 

...fall flat?

 

Or have you ever wished for pretty-as-a-picture polka dots...

 

...only to get gravity-defying cow patties?

 

How about something that should have been simply sublime...

 

...that turned terrifying?

 

Perhaps your "something blue"...

 

...has you seeing red?

 

Have you ever wanted creamy lace and bows...

 

...only to get "AAAAUUUGGHH!!"

Well, have you?

Yes?

Oh, good!

Then send me a picture, won't you?

This stuff cracks. me. up.

 

Thanks to brides Ashley B., Emily K., Lara A., Christie S., & Kathleen M. for sharing their private pain with us. So that we may laugh. And then feel kinda bad about it. But not enough to stop laughing.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:


Comic for June 28, 2017

Jun. 28th, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Men Of Marvel

Jun. 27th, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

Note: This post is not appropriate for young children. And the older ones will be all, "Ooooohh! I'm gonna tell DADDY!!" so you might lock them out, too.

 

Spider-Man's dirty little secret revealed:

Now that's a Dynamic Duo.

 

Here's one of the lesser-known heroes, Essenem Man:

He may not be much of a fighter, but he is always on the ball.

 

GRRAAA!! HULK TENSE!!

HULK TRY RELIEVE TENSION.

 

The good news: little Ryder had no idea why his mom was in such a hurry to cut the cake.

The bad news: everyone else at the party did.

 

Liz D., Kristen C., Mark F., & Rebecca J., I would tell you who my favorite superhero is, but I'm afraid it's a three-way tie.

Note: If you're wondering, the second cake is supposed to be Batman. Obviously.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.


Comic for June 27, 2017

Jun. 27th, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

A Mary Sing-Along

Jun. 26th, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by The CW Team

(In case you need a refresher:)

 

Iiiiit's....

Stupid-gobs-of-frosting-turned-into-a-scene-of-grossness

Can’t the wreckerators tell when something looks atrocious?



This is not a cake that would be served by any hostess!

Stupid-gobs-of-frosting-turned-into-a-scene-of-grossness!


  So many times when I buy cakes I find it quite absurd


 How often bakery frosting can look like a pile of turds


Or oozing sores…


 or vomit piles… 


or glistening, ruptured spleens

I just want a dessert that won't turn all of my guests green!

Oh…..

Stupid-gobs-of-frosting-turned-into-a-scene-of-grossness

 


Can’t the wreckerators tell when something looks atrocious?



This is not a cake that would be served by any hostess

 

Stupid-gobs-of-frosting-turned-into-a-scene-of-grossness!


(Move that away a little, I'm gonna die)

(Move that away a little, I'm gonna die)



Thanks to Kelly C., Paul W., Caitlin & Nanoo, Sue W., Jennifer S., Greg K., Dylan W., Lisa T., Heidi B., Jennifer H., and the always-amazing Sharyn for the song re-write!

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

Comic for June 26, 2017

Jun. 26th, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Sunday Sweets: Wedding Wonders

Jun. 25th, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

Shaped and themed cakes are awesome, of course, but I still drool and dream over more traditional wedding cakes, too. After all, they've come a long way from just simple tiers with flowers - even the simple tiers with flowers!

(By Sweet Life Patisserie)

Love this SO MUCH.

 

And take a look at this amazing "fabric" pleating:

(By Delectable by Su)

Hard to believe those tufted pinwheels and embroidered borders are all sugar. It's so perfect!

 

And check out the string work on this engagement beauty:

(By Hana of A Piece of Cake)

I love the curls on the top tier, and the piping on the bottom lace collar and upper level strings is simply awe-inspiring. Skill like this always renews my faith in cake artistry. :)

 

Here's a sweet dress-inspired design:

(By Jackie Nelson)

Look at the design at the bottom of the skirt ruffles!

 

And how's this for a modern twist on a classic?

(By Elizabeth's Cakes)

If you've never stacked or tried to support cakes in the shape of a ball before, let me assure you: it's hard. And all that detail! Totally swoon-worthy.

 

Another rounded design:

(By See-Through-Silence)

See that lace border on top? Someone piped that. Yeah. Respect!

 

And speaking of mad piping skills:

(By The Cake Gallery)

Whoah. This reminds me of the Victorian-themed Grand Floridian resort here in Orlando. Frills and bows and hand-piped lace, oh my!

 

Or, for a more modern touch:

(By Fleur de Lisa Cakes)

This has been one of my favorite designs since before I even started CW. I love the swirls and the bold flowers.

 

Or, how about John's favorite?

(By Sugarbelle Cakes)

WOW. Just...wow.

 

And finally, the cake that had me scooping my jaw off the desk:

(By Susan Trianos aka Peecheekeeno)

That's all *cake*, guys. Look at that tufted tier in the middle. LOOK AT IT. Now, tell me: how the heck do they DO that? Not to mention the perfect corset lacing, the bows, the ruffles, the porcelain-perfect gumpaste roses...seriously, I think I could stare at this all day. Just. Gorgeous.

 

Happy Sunday!

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:


Comic for June 25, 2017

Jun. 25th, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Comic for June 24, 2017

Jun. 24th, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Merci!

Jun. 23rd, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

Have you heard of the Croquembouche [CROCK-you-EAM-butchy]? It's a French thing.

Well, if not, here's what it's supposed to look like:

So kinda like old, cobweb-wrapped monkey bread. But in a yummy way.

 

Well, a certain anonymous person - who shall remain unnamed to protect her anonymity - found this gem at a wedding which she may or may not have anonymously attended:

I believe her exact words were, "it looks like some kind of primitive jungle cake being attacked by a swarm of lactating spider-wasps."

Mmmm, lactating spider-wasps...

Well, uh, Jane D. [wink wink], thanks for putting a new spin on these things.

 

Note: I think it's important to ask yourself a couple of questions before commenting here on Cake Wrecks:
Question: Did Jen and john really intend to give us the pronunciation of a word?
Answer: No.
Question: Are Jen and john complete and total idiots?
Answer: No.
Question: Do they...
Answer: No.
Question: Would they...
Answer: No.
Question: What about...
Answer: No.
That is all.

 

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

Comic for June 23, 2017

Jun. 23rd, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

New Discoveries in the Animal Kingdom

Jun. 22nd, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

I believe that all new scientific discoveries should be announced via cake, don't you?

[pushing back glasses and consulting clipboard] Ladies and gentlemen, I'm proud to present...

The Majestic Bagel-Nosed Falcon of Uganda!

Or it might be a fish. Fish...falcon...you know. Whatevs.

 

[Shuffling papers] Next we have...

The Majestic Happy Chicken-Footed Spiny-Backed Slime Devil.
(Watch out; they spit.)

 

We're still working on the scientific name for this one:

So for now let's just call it the Majestic Coiled Crap Hound.
(I think that has a real ring to it, don't you?)

 

Here we have a particularly colorful specimen:

The Majestic Disco Newt! Let's pause a moment to admire his beautiful plumage.

Right. That's long enough.

 

And finally, we have...

The Majestic Three-Toed Four-Eyed Whiskered Zebra Toad.
(Yeah, you heard me. ZooBorns, eat your heart out.)

 

Thanks to Kelly D., Kit R., Caitlin B., Jordan J. and Donald L., who are all, er, majestic.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

Comic for June 22, 2017

Jun. 22nd, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Picture This

Jun. 21st, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by Jen

So Shawna A. asked her bakery to make a cake just like this one from Pink Cake Box:

To make it easier, she even brought in a print-out of this picture. And, since she wanted her cake to say "Welcome Little Monkey" instead of "Happy Birthday," she was sure to cross that bit out. That way, there could be no confusion whatsoever, right?

 

Riiiight.

All in favor of banning the edible photo printer for all eternity, say "Oy VEY."

 

I think the "veys" have it, Shawna.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.


Comic for June 21, 2017

Jun. 21st, 2017 11:59 pm
[syndicated profile] dilbert_feed
Dilbert readers - Please visit Dilbert.com to read this feature. Due to changes with our feeds, we are now making this RSS feed a link to Dilbert.com.

Lord Of The Facepalms

Jun. 20th, 2017 01:00 pm
[syndicated profile] cakewrecks_feed

Posted by john (the hubby of Jen)

Brandon wanted a Bunko-themed cake with three dice on it.

 

Danielle asked for "Linda" in white icing.

 

Francie ordered a 50th birthday cake for a friend, noting that she wanted to pick it up "today."

 

Kristin's friend ordered a cake that was supposed to read "Happy Mother's Day/Birthday" or "Happy Birthday/Mother's Day" - whichever the baker thought sounded best.

 

And finally, there were three choices of decorations on the order form: balloons, roses, or mums. Dee chose mums.

 

Thanks to Brandon M., Danielle J., Francie R., Kristin D., & D.R. for proving one does not simply order from a wreckery.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:


Profile

mrflagg: (Default)
mrflagg

May 2013

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415 161718
19202122232425
262728293031 

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 28th, 2017 05:32 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios