boom shaka laka

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/now-thats-a-bad-day-2026

Where is the moment we needed the most?

You kick up the leaves and the Volvo is lost...

You tell me your blue skies fade to grey

Your baker still hates you, too, they say

But I don't need no carryin' on!

You fall in the line just to hit a new low

You pretend that you meant to, but everyone knows

You tell me it's hard working here offline

Your coworkers mock you all the time

But I don't need no carryin' on!

So you had a bad day

You're itching downtown,

You sing a sad song just to drown out the sound!

You say you must know,

You tell me don't lie,

Then you work on a smile and you opt for the pie.

You had a bad day!

Now that's a bad day.

 

Thanks to wreckporters Connie L., Deborah P., Melissa F., Fribby, Monique R., Anony M., & Rachel B. for inspiring a new CW policy: from now on, we want any and all apologies handwritten. ON CAKE.

*****

P.S. I don't know if this will turn a bad day around, but I find having my tatas comfy sure helps. So here's a shout-out to my favorite wire-free bra:

Warner's Easy Does It Seamless Wireless Bra

I own four of these now, and plan to keep buying all the colors. Up 'til last year I ONLY wore wired bras - usually Warners -  and it took buying-and-returning over a dozen different brands and styles before I found a wireless one I liked. This one averages $25-40 Prime, so I watch the listing and buy any color that goes on sale. (Today "Toasted" is $22, so I snagged one of those.)

 I love the under-arm smoothing panel - no dig or pinch! - and like most Warners, these are incredibly comfortable. Be sure to check the image gallery for a better idea of how they look on larger tracts of land.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/now-thats-a-bad-day-2026

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/fade-to-wreck-2026

Just when you thought Mondays couldn't get any better, along comes...

WEDDING WRECKS!

 

Molly S. ordered this lovely ombré design for her wedding cake:

But instead, she got this:

Molly paid $500 for it.
It was still frozen solid in the middle.
And it left a giant puddle on the tablecloth.

NEXT!

 

Stephanie R. tells us the bride wanted a combo of these two cakes:

Oooh. Aaah.

So, a blue ombré fade on a smooth tiered cake with a monogram?

ROGER THAT.

o.0

***

ROGER, KILL THAT.

 

And finally, not a wedding cake, but Michelle tells me they wanted this for Madisyn's birthday:

 

I guess the baker didn't feel like making all those strands of fondant, though - which would probably be ok, provided the aforementioned baker can pipe even lines of oh who are we kidding.

Mmm. Finger-y.

 

Thanks to Molly, Stephanie, & Michelle for reminding us maybe it's time for a new trend. I'm thinking... chevrons. Eh? What could go wrong?

*****

P.S. It's never too early to start decorating for spooky season, and these stick-on bats were my biggest hit last year:

3D Halloween Bats, Exterior Grade, 60 pc set

They're made of sturdy plastic, come in 4 different sizes, and have adhesive pads to easily stick them up anywhere in or outside your home. (I put a whole belfry of them on our front door.) (I don't know if "belfry" is right, but I'm going with it. :D) Even better, the whole 60 piece set is only $9 Prime!

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/fade-to-wreck-2026

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/stick-a-pick-in-it-2026

"...and to avoid any possible mistakes, instead of any writing on the cake I'd like you to just use one of those plastic 'Happy Birthday' picks, please."

 

"No, no, I don't want you to write it, I want you to use one. You know, the 'Happy Birthday' sticks? Yes. One of those."

 

"Maybe I'm using the wrong word. Um... do you have a decorative plaque you put on cakes? One that says 'Happy Birthday'? Because that's all I want. Really. Just that!"

[massaging temples]

 

"See, now you just wrote 'pick' again."

 

"Aha! Well, you DID use some birthday plaques this time. But see, that's all I want! No writing, just one plain 'Happy Birthday' plaque."

 

"I feel like we're going in circles here.

 

"Tell you what, forget the sticks, picks, and plaques, k? Go ahead and write happy birthday. JUST HAPPY BIRTHDAY. That's it. Got it?"

 

Thanks to Emily H., Garret E., Dan N., Savannah W., Shelly F., Melissa W., & Evan H. for today's just desserts.

*****

P.S. Speaking of things that make your head hurt, a friend recently got me this gel cap for my migraines, and sweet icy Stay Puft, y'all, it's amazing:

Migraine Hot/Cold Gel Cap
 

 I have a huge head and a lot of hair, so it's pretty snug on me, but the extra pressure with the cold is heavenly during a migraine. I used to hold a cold pack and keep shifting it around from side to side, but this wraps my entire skull in a cooling hug. Ahhhh so good.

I keep the gel cap sealed in the fridge all the time now, so I can grab it as soon as a headache starts up. The cold only lasts 15-20 minutes, but it's 1000% worth it in my book, highly recommend.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/stick-a-pick-in-it-2026

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/lets-play-telephone-2026

Ever wonder what could possibly go wrong with a simple inscription on a basic cake? Well, WONDER NO MORE. 

Below I've listed the inscriptions some of my trusty Wreckporters ordered from professional bakeries, followed by the cakes they actually received:

 

"God Bless Neal"

I hear it's His middle name.

 

"Welcome Baby Arnold"

The spacing is what really sells it.

 

"Happy Birthday Mom"

Now that's a cake only a mother named Bob could love.

[Btw, I'm starting to wonder if a baker named Bob is doing these on purpose. And if so, I want to shake Bob's hand.]

 

"Congrats British Lit"

I hope this starts a trend; I want to see all the ways bakers butcher "Kyrgyzstanian."

 

"Happy Bandwidth Upgrade Day"

"Band With Upgrade" is the name of my retro Steam Powered Giraffe cover band.

(I realize only about 3 people will get that joke... and I'm ok with that.)

 

"Grats to Dad"

I like to think this is the baker's revenge on everyone who shortens "congratulations" to "grats." "CONGRATS" IS SHORT ENOUGH, PEOPLE.

 

"Old Dirty Thirty"

At some point you stop being surprised. Or so I'm told.

 

"When I'm 64"

That's actually how John says it when he's singing in his "drunk McCartney" voice, so maybe Kit sang her order over the phone. Drunk. While imitating Paul McCartney. 

(Don't keep us in suspense, now, Kit: did you?)

 

Thanks to Colleen C., Suzanne R., Morgan & Eric, Katie D., Ethan D., Leslie C., Becky L., & Kit K. for really phoning it in today. ;)

*****

P.S. Need a cool gift for the person who has everything? Then how about a card that transforms into a bouquet:

Fresh Cut Pop-Up Bouquet, "Pumpkin Harvest"

I've been raving about Fresh Cut Paper for a while now, and they just added two new Fall designs: this "Pumpkin Harvest" bouquet:

...and a pop-up wreath!? Ohhh, this is cool:

When I send my grandmother cards she likes to tack them up up on her wall, so I just sent her this one, which is meant to hang up, and doubles as pretty Fall decor. There are more styles, too, so go see all the Fresh Cut Paper designs here.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/lets-play-telephone-2026

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sunday-sweets-filibuster-edition-2026

A friend once told me, "I love all your posts, but I have to admit, on Sundays you could really write anything. I'm just there for the gorgeous cakes."

Hey, works for me! So, let's see, all I need is to pull together a bunch of amazing cakes, like this:

(By BMT Cake Designs)

...and then fill up the page with whatever I want. It's a Sweets filibuster!

 

Does anybody have a copy of Green Eggs and Ham?
No? Ok, never mind. I'll improvise.

(By Jessicakes)

But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, Who is already sick and pale with grief, That thou her maid art far more fair than she.

 

(By Mike's Amazing Cakes)

A towel is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V ... and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

 

(By Mishelle Handy Cakes, pic by David Baxter Photography)

I read some 4 and 5 star reviews by those who used this device successfully to change a baby while driving. On that basis, I bought one. I put my baby on it and drove for over an hour. It did not change. Same baby. I am glad it worked for some people but I will be returning mine.

 

(By Cotton and Crumbs)

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

 

(By Iced and Dazzle, pic by Erin Schaefgen Photography)

I hated her... SOOO... much, it - flame, flames? Flames, on the side of my face, breathing - breath, heaving breaths. Heaving breaths... Heathing...

 

(By Cakes Decor member Ria123)

Up up down down left right left right B A start.

 

(By Lovely Cakes)

"You are using Bonetti's defense against me, ah?"
"I thought it fitting, considering the rocky terrain."
"Naturally, you must expect me to attack with Capo Ferro."
"Naturally, but I find that Thibault cancels out Capo Ferro, don't you?"

 

(By Rosebud Cakes)

...and I believe you should put a woman on a pedestal.. high enough so you can look up her dress. And I believe in equality, equality for everyone.. no matter how stupid they are, or how much better I am than they are. And, people say I'm crazy for believing this, but I believe that robots are stealing my luggage.

 

(By Cakes By Beth)

A king cake is a type of cake associated in a number of countries with the festival of Epiphany at the end of the Christmas season, and in other places with the pre-Lenten celebrations of Mardi Gras / Carnival. The cake often has a small plastic baby (said to represent Baby Jesus) inside (or sometimes placed underneath), and the person who gets the piece of cake with the trinket has various privileges and obligations.

 

(By Party Flavors Custom Cakes, photo by Amanda McMahon Photography)

1. Take ice tray over to the sink and fill it with cold water.
2. Place the water-filled ice tray back in the freezer.
3. Shut the door to the freezer.

 

(By Neli Josefson)

During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!

That's it! The filibuster's over.

Thank goodness these Sweets speak for themselves.

*****

P.S. Need a cool gift for the person who has everything? Then how about a card that transforms into a bouquet:

Fresh Cut Pop-Up Bouquet, "Pumpkin Harvest"

I've been raving about Fresh Cut Paper for a while now, and they just added two new Fall designs: this "Pumpkin Harvest" bouquet:

...and a pop-up wreath!? Ohhh, this is cool:

When I send my grandmother cards she likes to tack them up up on her wall, so I love that this card is meant to hang! There are more styles, too, so go see all the Fresh Cut Paper designs here.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sunday-sweets-filibuster-edition-2026

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/i-think-i-get-the-picture-2026

"Hi, I'd like to order a monkey cake for my son, but I want to make sure there won't be any mix-ups like what happened last week."

"Oh? What happened last week?"

"Well, I brought in a reference for my nephew's monkey cake - a paper party plate -  and you guys just took a picture of it and glued the picture to the cake!"

 "I see. And that's bad because....?"

"Because I just wanted the monkey! Not the paper plate!!"

"OH! Oh, yes! Of course. Sorry, I thought that was some kind of a pun."

[silence]

"So...look, this time, just to be extra clear, I brought you a picture of the actual cake I want you to make. Here:"

 

"So you want a cake that looks just like this?"

"That's right, a cake that looks JUST LIKE THAT."

[silence]

"I think we can do that."

"Good. Thank you. I'm so glad we got that cleared up."

 

****

 

Poor 2nd Devon. (Or is that 2rd Devon?) Although I guess it IS kind of fitting that the Devon copy gets a cake copy (complete with copied candles!). Hey, how much do you wanna bet his presents were all just pictures of toys? :D

Thanks for the monkey business,  Kee & Erin M.

*****

P.S. It's never too early to start decorating for spooky season, and these stick-on bats were my biggest hit last year:

3D Halloween Bats, Exterior Grade, 60 pc set

They're made of sturdy plastic, come in 4 different sizes, and have adhesive pads to easily stick them up anywhere in or outside your home. (I put a whole belfry of them on our front door.) (I don't know if "belfry" is right, but I'm going with it. :D) Even better, the whole 60 piece set is only $8 Prime!

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/i-think-i-get-the-picture-2026